Is Religion Pure Insanity?

Apparently there's this little holiday in Latin America called Semana Santa. I never knew about it because it didn't show up on Stevie's "Fireman of The Year" calendar that we use for event planning. I later learned that this is just Easter without the bunny, so the little kids down here are getting hosed in my opinion.

On this particular holiday everyone in the entire country heads for the beach. So we decided to go inland to the mountains. The surf sucked anyway and we've been wanting to see the cloud forest. The mountains of Costa Rica are surprisingly large. We left the beach and drove uphill for damn near 3 hours. Finally we topped out at what I assume was the famous cloud forest. I'm sure it is beautiful if you can see through clouds. I cannot and found the driving incredibly challenging.

Our destination for the day was a little mountain town called Orosi. Back in the 90s a couple friends of mine had started a kayak company and named it after this town. I wanted to go see why. It was also on the way to our next destination which was Turrialba. This was the town I went to back in 1991 when I was training with the US Olympic Kayak Team. We spent 3 winters here training for the race season. I have many fond memories of the place and can't wait to see how it has changed in 20 years. Oh my god, did I just say that? Man I'm getting old.

On our way to Orosi we saw displays of Semana Santa everywhere. Stevie and I had just watched an amazing documentary called Constantine's Sword (more info here). Watch it, it's good.  It explores the dark side of Christianity. I found it very interesting that the cross did not even exist in the religion until over 300 years after Christ died. It was introduced by Constantine as a symbol for conquering others in war. It had a tag line that read "In Hoc Signo Vinces", which means "By This symbol you will conquer". Millions of people have been murdered over the last 2000 years in religious wars. And the madness continues today.

"Religion is an important part. I believe we ought to love our neighbor like we love ourself. That's manifested in public policy through the faith-based initiative where we've unleashed the armies of compassion. I believe that God wants everybody to be free. That's what I believe. And that's part of my foreign policy. I believe that freedom is a gift from the Almighty. And I can't tell you how encouraged I am to see freedom on the march. And so my principles that I make decisions on are a part of me. And religion is a part of me." 

- George W Bush

The armies of compassion have incidentally murdered tens of thousands of innocent men, women, and children in the middle east over the last 10 years. But when freedom is on the march, we just call that collateral damage. Newsflash all you nutty religious zealots - Jesus didn't kill! He didn't even fight. He would not have supported any war no matter how it was justified. He was an enlightened, peaceful, loving man and he would have thought you were F@CKING crazy. Why do people blindly follow this madness? Because religion is pure insanity.

Ok, I'm sure that will piss some people off. Happy Easter. Carry on. TREE

Read more »

I suck at being a MAN

I suck at doing manly stuff. I don't know engines. I'm not technical or mechanical. Need something fixed? Don't call me. I don't know how to use half my tools. Seriously, I only bought them to fill the box. Plus I don't like to get dirty.

My gifts lie in identifying the things I'm NOT good at, and then surrounding myself with people who are. Arriving back in Costa Rica I had 3 critical manly things that needed to get done on the van. So I went on a mission to find the manliest man I know, my pal Chad from Pleasure Device. Luckliy Pleasure Device wasn't far away. They were set up in a little surf town called Esterrillos Oeste only 30 mintutes south.

After arriving in the heat of the day, I proceeded to rope Chad into the projects. First up was to install the new van refrigerator. The guy at the store told me, "the installation is a slam dunk, plug and play, a monkey could do it." That last part was enough to convince me that I needed Chad's help. Turns out it wasn't plug and play, and thank god Chad knew all about wiring, shimming, fuses, and capping propane. He did let me hold the lighter and melt a plastic thingy.

Next up was replacing the turbo resonator again. If you follow the blog you'll remember that this part died on us back in Honduras (read that post here). Luckily I was carrying the spare factory part. But there was no way I was gonna let that happen again. The best offense is a good defense. I found a custom built all metal version of the plastic part online and brought it back from the States. It's called the ELIMINATOR! Won't have to worry about that little problem again suckas.

Chad's next job wasn't so easy. I wanted him to build wood panels that block off all entrances to the cabin of the van. Why would we do this? Good question. For those who don't know, there are no roads that connect Central and South America. There is a 100 mile stretch of jungle between Panama and Colombia called the Darien Gap. The only way around this is to ship your vehicle on a freighter. Our van won't fit into a container, so we're going to have to hand over our keys. Someone will drive the van onto the boat and we'll fly south and pick it up in Columbia 2 days later.  All we can do is hope that nobody is motivated enough to cut through our protective wood panels and rob us blind. Joy. FYI, We plan to ship to South America at the end of May.

After the work was done, Pleasure Device sprung a little birthday surprise on us. They had secured a really nice bottle of champagne. We love these guys. They are so amazing! The sad thing is that we're not going to see them again for a long time. They are heading to Tierra Del Fuego as well, but they plan to lurk in Costa for another 2-3 months. By the time they leave we'll be deep into South America. Eventually we'll see them, but probably not until fall or maybe even winter.


I think Chad was pretty shook up about it. As we pulled away he followed the ADVENTURES OF PLEASURE LIFE tradition of waving and running next to the vehicle. He even tried to climb into my window. He was doing well until I hit the gas, which sent him spinning and almost falling to the pavement. It was awesome. Goodbye Pleasure. We love you guys. TREE

Read more »

Home is where you hang your hat...

Home is where you hang your hat. As a nomad I've always been fond of that saying. I've been living on the road for years, and those words have been my truth. I never felt like I was on a "trip" because I was exactly where I was supposed to be. As I was packing for my return to Costa Rica I realized that those words are no longer true. Now my home is wherever Stevie hangs HER hat. And it appears that if I'm anywhere else in the world, my heart just longs to go home. 

Assuming I can fit all the wine and chocolate bars into my suitcase, that reunion isn't far away. But I have no illusions. The airport is really going to SUCK IT. In addition to a ton of luggage, I'm also bringing home a new refrigerator for the Sprinter. The Outdoorplay boys helped me wrap it up for the flight back to Costa (thanks Kody and Tristan). Hopefully I can get it through customs without damage or incident. I give myself a 32% chance of success, but hey, I'm an optimist.


I said goodbye to all my friends in Hood River. I'm a narrow and deep type of person. I don't have a lot of close friends, but I love and value the ones I have. I had an especially fun night hanging out with Maui and his beautiful family. Maui wasn't holding anything back with the wine. We drank a L'Ecole Cab, something in the middle which I can't remember,  and then finished on a Napa Valley Frogs Leap. Then at the end of the night that crazy man gave me a can of Rainier beer. Now that's a baller!


The research for our next vehicle is pretty much complete. We've received well over 50 emails from people offering all kinds of suggestions. Many have pointed out that our Sprinter would make it just fine. You're right. And yes, people have done the drive in old VW busses and vintage cars, but thats just not how Sprinter Life rolls. Buying a vehicle on every continent was another suggestion. But our decision has to consider several important variables. We plan to be on the road for years, not months. So for sanity sake, we really want a place we can call home. We plan to have a kid so we need more room than the Sprinter. We want it to be fully self contained and able to operate completely off the grid. We want a safe all-terrain vehicle. After driving in these insane countries with no traffic laws I want my family in a TANK. And we want the vehicle to have a huge worldwide dealer network. Oh yeah, and Stevie says it has to have hot water and a shoe rack.

I've ruled out a truck camper because I just can't fathom driving across remote far-away countries in a Ford. "Built Ford Tough" is an oxymoron. I attended the NW Sprinter Convention and also ruled out another van. I really like the 4x4 converted Sprinters (shown above), but those things are super custom and not easy to fix. The full RV Sprinters have room, but not enough ground clearance or durability. So I narrowed down our dream home to a Mercedes Benz Unimog U-500, hopefully built by Global Expedition Vehicles. This vehicle is only 2 ft longer and 1.5 ft wider than our van, but it has soooo much more room. But these things aren't cheap, and therein lies our crux. We just need to somehow manifest it.  Let's make it happen. I believe! I believe! TREE

Read more »

Sprinter Life Family Letters #4

Dear lover, 

Here's a picture of Veronica and I from last week's School of the World field trip- the kayak and snorkel tour. The tour company had one giant canoe but only had two kayaks, one double and one single. Faced with competition, I had to rochambeau for the double. You'll never believe this (because whenever we play you always win) but this time,  I WON.  See, unbeknownst to you, I've been studying your strategy (which I will not disclose here on the blog) of which comes first- the rock, the paper, or the scissors- and I applied it against Mackenzie, my unsuspecting opponent. We opted for 2 out of 3, and I scored the victory on shake 2.  Shah-bam! My only lament is that your method doesn't work against you. 

You really have taught me so much in the past six years. I've always been passionate about life, but you have given me even more things to love- like sleeping under the stars, surfing in warm water, rafting the Colorado, traveling the world- and most of all, YOU. 

On Saturday, after Veronica left, Kiki and the SOTW ladies and I hiked a couple of miles up a mountain outside of Jaco to an abandoned half-built structure overlooking the ocean.  I have no idea what it was doing there or who built it or when, but it was there, and we seized the moment. Renee led an absolutely amazing yoga class that blew us all away. It was the perfect way to end the week. 

In regard to your  letter last week.... I, too, learned proper pee etiquette

    

And I also wanted to let you know that I am so happy that you are drinking amazing red wine and eating gourmet food without me.  I'm not bothered at all that you've been wine tasting in the gorge, that you went to Pomodoros and ate the lamb and mint cannelloni- my favorite dish in the whole world- or that you went to Celilo and had an exquisite local grown organic meal accompanied by a bottle of L'ecole no.41, a bottle of Frog's Leap, and, oh wait you can't remember the THIRD one because you had soooooo much delicious wine. No, no, I'm not bitter about any of that stuff. 

Likewise, even though you've been suffering in the cold and rainy northwest for the past two weeks,  I bet you're really happy that I've been surfing every day in the hot Costa Rican sun...

                                                                   with Geudy....

                                                                  

Carlos.....

And Rodrigo!

(Ohhhh, calm down every one, I kid, I kid.  These guys are just the surf instructors at SOTW. Carlos, the guy in the middle, is actually a friend of Tree's, and he protested heavily about participating in the joke. He did not think it was funny, as evidenced by the look on his face)

On a not so funny note, Kiki has been having a tough time.  She's had two vet appointments since you've been gone. The first one was to have a CBC done to see how she's recovering from the Ehrichliosis (tick fever), to get a Bordetella vaccination, and to get an updated health certificate. Her blood test came back mostly fine; her platelets are still a little low, but her red and white blood cells are normal, as is her renal function. All in all, the vet was super impressed by how well she's doing for a twelve year old dog (that's 84 in people years!).  I bought her some special vitamins to boost up her blood, and the vet said to get her retested in a month. 

The second appointment was for her teeth cleaning. Here she is being consoled by two vet techs while a third one prepped her for her anesthesia. When I snuck in to give her one last kiss,  I expected to see her being held down with brute force and screaming for mercy--but no, not our Kiki. There she was, sitting pretty and polite in a circle of nurses, as if she'd somehow convinced them that playing a quick game of bridge would be far more fun than cleaning her teeth. 

Only a few more days lover. Your girls miss you madly and forever- STEVIE

ps. I still HEART you!

Read more »

Pain Does Not Exist In This Dojo... Does It?

Sometimes travel hurts. Before I left Costa 10 days ago I felt like I was staring down Cobra Kai. The schedule looked pretty hectic, but that's when you have to dig deep.

I flew from Costa Rica to Houston, Houston to Portland. Then I drove to Hood River, back to Portland, back to Hood River,  back to Portland, then up to Seattle. Monday I flew from Seattle to St. Louis where I rented a car and drove 4 hours to Nixa. Yesterday I spent 6 hours with Mike Van Pelt, the owner of Global Expedition Vehicles. After an intensive 6 hour learning session I drove 4 hours back to St Louis where I barely made my flight back to Seattle. Then this morning I drove from Seattle back to Hood River and here I am.

I'll finish out the week at Outdoorplay. I'll attend back to back to back to back dinners with old friends because nurturing my relationships is important to me.  I'll attend a Sprinter van convention on Saturday, and then fly back to Costa Rica on Sunday. I'm super tired but I'm feeling like it's been a successful trip back to the States. I don't want to brag, but I pretty much crane-kicked that travel schedule right off the map. Now I can't wait to see my girls! TREE

Read more »